Nick, twenty-two, falls in love with Hilli, his German co-worker. The problem is that Hilli, thirty-six, is married with two sons. They start an adulterous affair and their sexual attraction for each other is enhanced because Nick is coloured and Hilli is white. Initially, Nick seeks the thrill of making love with a mature woman but he falls in love with Hilli. When their clandestine affair is exposed, Nick resigns from his job to return to his home country. They decide to spend ten days in a lakeside resort before Nick leaves Germany. Their single-minded pursuit of sexual fulfilment leads to suffering and sadness. Nick’s obsessive love for Hilli lasts through the decades and highlights the problems when romance enters an adulterous relationship. Read the book to see how this liaison plays out.
WARNING 18+: This book contains material that may be considered offensive to some readers since it contains explicit sex scenes.
What Inspired You to Write Your Book?
This is a true experience presented as fiction. What started as an office romance turned out to be a life-long obsession on my part. Writers live twice. After living through an intense love affair, I relived the experience once again while writing this book. It was a form of self therapy to understand my inner self and motivations.
How Did You Come up With Your Characters?
I modelled my main character on my female friend and lover. All I had to do was to think about our time together and I came up with a plausible character. It was only after her death that I decided to publish this book.
While Hilli and I walked in the direction of Rehberge Park, my mind was occupied on my next move.
Within me, there was a sense of exhilaration combined with nervousness. I was happy that Hilli has accepted my proposal to walk to the park. Yet, I was unsure as to how this would play out. Although I had visited the park several years ago, all I remembered was that it was big with lawns, footpaths and a lake. I had no idea what we would do once we got there.
“The walk is doing me good,” I said in a bid to ease the tension building up within me.
“What actually took place between Ingeborg and you when you went to her place?” Hilli asked.
“Nothing,” I replied, surprised that my story about seeing Ingeborg to her place was still on her mind.
“Are you sure that you did not kiss her?” Hilli studied my face.
“It may have been a chaste good-night kiss,” I admitted.
“Are you sure?”
“Believe me, there is absolutely nothing between Ingeborg and me,” I said.
Hilli said nothing and her heartfelt look spoke volumes. I decided to speak up what was on my mind.
“If you must know, I only have eyes for you,” I said, remembering the first lines of one of my favourite songs.
“You are a stupid boy,” she smiled.
Since both of us were slightly intoxicated. I felt bold enough to finally express my true feelings for her. At the same time, I could feel a heady attraction for this woman rising within me.
“I mean it,” I protested. “I am in love with you.”
“You will soon find a nice girl your age and fall in love with her.”
We talked in a light, flirtish manner for a while till we reached the end of Otawi Street. Crossing Africa Street to enter the park, I felt as if I was crossing the Rubicon into an uncharted territory.
We entered the park along a broad tree-lined pathway that led to a crossing. We turned left since I assumed that this pathway would lead to an area where there would be less people. I was not sure where we were going as we walked through a labyrinth of pathways until I sighted a bench on top of a grass meadow. We left the pathway and walked up to the top of the mound. Once we were there, we stood facing each other.
“It is now or never,” I thought to myself. The alcohol was having its effects. Throwing all caution to the winds, I embraced her, kissing her on her cheeks and her neck. She did not resist. She looked into my eyes for a few seconds and then she leaned forward to press her lips against mine. My body shook with excitement, as I could not believe what was actually happening.
Suddenly Hilli’s lips parted and her tongue probed my mouth. Her mouth was so hot and moist on mine. When we kissed, her tongue was strong, dominant and held mine down. We stopped to catch our breaths. One kiss followed another. They were fiery wet kisses. While the alcohol had lessened our inhibitions, it was as if our hidden longing for each other was manifesting itself.
I had dreamed about this moment so often that I could hardly dared to believe that it was real. It was, however, everything that I thought it would be and even more.
Breathless with desire, I pressed my erection against her soft body, inhaling her alcohol-tinged breath and the perfume on her neck.
“You are a rascal, " she moaned with dreamy, half-closed eyes.
Despite my alcohol-driven high, I was aware that I had crossed a frontier. I was kissing a married woman and a colleague.
“Let’s sit on the bench for a moment,” I suggested. She sat down and I took my place next to her. I observed her facial features which made her so attractive. She always kept her dark brown hair well-groomed with every tress in place. Her almond-shaped hazel eyes sparkled whenever she smiled. Her small, straight nose and full lips, which she accentuated with bright red lipstick, resulted in a striking face. Up close, she looked more beautiful than ever.
We were both silent. There was nothing to be said. Our looks conveyed their message. We were living for the moment.
I leaned closer towards her, savouring the warmth of her breath against my face. I licked her ear and nibbled her neck. When I pressed my lips behind her ear, I felt her shudder. Apparently, I had touched a sensitive spot. She put her arm around my neck and I felt a jolt rush through my spine.
We started a new round of kissing, stopping just to catch our breath. It was as if were catching up for all the lost time during the past months. Finally, she broke away to look at her watch.
“It is almost eight p.m.,” she said. “I must go.”
I was surprised that the time has passed so fast. It was late spring and the days were getting longer with the sun was just going down now.
“I will accompany you to the station,” I said. We got up and started our walk.
“Now you know how I feel about you,” I said. She nodded but was unusually silent. I assumed she was also thinking about the consequences of what had taken place, hoping that she did not regret our impulsive actions.
When we arrived at the station, we just shook hands. She turned around and walked down the stairs while I admired her slender figure and shapely legs in high heels. I felt a sense of loss as she disappeared in the darkness and hoped that she would be there the next morning.
Travelling in the bus, I could still not grasp what had taken place. I had actually kissed the woman of my dreams, the object of my nocturnal fantasies. Could it be possible that perhaps our feelings for each other were really reciprocal?
Hilli had everything that I was looking for in a woman: she was pretty, seductive, charming and elegant. I wanted her – even though I knew that I was stupidly smitten and straying into dangerous terrain. I also knew that nothing could take place between us until Hilli let it be known that she was willing to meet with me again.
That night I engaged in my masturbatory fantasies, now knowing that the reality was ten times better than I had imagined it to be. I could not wait for our next time together.
Nick Shaw has been a passionate reader and writer ever since his youth. He has travelled in many countries and his books have a common theme: interracial relationships in the context of prevailing attitudes and prejudices.
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